Your Other Left...or Why I Don't Go to the Mall

Next week I'm going to Forever 21 for the first time since I started this blog. In fact, I haven't been to Forever 21 since I worked downtown and used to play hooky during lunch. I didn't even get a lunch (I worked through it in order to get out of work faster) but some days I would need to go to the "printer" or "take some photos" or someplace equally fake. Instead, I either drove around aimlessly trying to figure out why I was wasting my life working in a windowless office with a boss who was a cross between Martha Stewart and Hitler, or I'd go shopping. And feel guilty about it the whole time. Long story short, I haven't been to Forever 21 in a long, long time. Part of that is because the only one's around here are in malls, and I hate the mall. I hate the smell...the mix of Cinnabon, Bath and Body Works, and teenager. But the main reason I hate the mall is because of my (self diagnosed) directional dyslexia. Anyone who knows me, has traveled with me, or ever asked me for directions knows I am hopeless. I can't tell my right from my left, or North from South, it's that bad. (Isn't that sad? I should be in a support group or something. Hello my name is Tracy and I'm really lame).
So anyway, I walk in to a store, shop around, then leave. And can't remember which way I came in. I literally end up walking in circles, completely lost and eventually frustrated. Plus the people there walk way too slow. SO...I don't go to the mall. But next week, I'm going to a Forever 21 that's in an old Gottschalks, completely non-mall. And it's close to the beach. Life is good. (Plus when you're close to the beach, it's really easy to tell which way is West!)

The scoop, all from Forever 21:
Earrings, $7.80
Floral Tunic, $19.80
Linen Pants, $22.80
Sunglasses, $5.80
Sandals, $19.80
Purse, $29.80

The Dangers of Being Cheap

Sometimes being cheap isn't the best route to take. Take this wine, for instance. I snagged two bottles at Walmart for $1.97 a piece. Thinking I had scored the deal of the century, I chilled a bottle of Chardonnay to drink whilst watching Mad Men. (Netflix, not cable...if a bottle of two dollar wine did not already alert you to the fact that we are incredibly cheap).
Long story short, one glass was all either my husband or I could drink. Think white grape juice mixed with rubbing alcohol and vodka. The rest of the bottle went down the sink.
End of the story, you may think. Wrong! We both woke up with killer hangover headaches...from one glass of wine! If I'm going to have a hangover, I better have had a whole lot of fun getting it.
Moral of the story...there are some things worth spending money on. At least more than 2 bucks.

Colored Denim on the Cheap

Lindsay sent me an email the other day which said, "Hey Tracy-I have a mission for you. I love the colored denim trend, but can't find anything that is actually affordable! I am looking for teal or turquoise skinny leg jeans- have any ideas?"
You bet I have some ideas! What do you think about those jeans up there? I know the purple ones are a little out there, but I thought I'd throw them in for fun. The best part is they are all under 30 bucks! 
What trends are you jumping on this summer? 
The scoop: 
Skyscraper Colored Jeans, Roxy  $30.99
Victoria's Secret Low Five Capri's   $14.99
Element Daryl Denim, Swell    $19.99
Zipper Pocket Twill Pant, Forever 21     $13.50

New Place for Cheap Clothes!

Our haul from this morning's shopping trip! 

Just got back from a totally blog-worthy shopping trip with my friend Alyssa, and must share! Alyssa and I are two peas in a pod. We pick out the same stuff constantly. That scarf up there? We both bought one at Payless. I had that ring in my hand and put it back, then she picked it up (without knowing I had almost bought it) and added it to her pile. What can I say, we must have great taste! (or at least very similar taste!)

When it comes to clothes, a successful shopping outing for us is a trip to the Cancer Society Thrift store and Payless Shoes. Imagine our delight when a consignment store opened just blocks from our houses! (We're neighbors, too...so much fun to have your friend right around the corner!) The new store is called the Clothesline, and it ROCKS. Those jeans? Paige Premium Denim, retail price $198. My price? $29.99**! And the cocktail ring was just $3.95. But the coupe de grace, the best deal of century, are those Donald J Pliner Couture heels. Neither Alyssa nor I knew who the heck he was, we just knew they were very "cha cha"! But the owners Sy and Cathy (who has an awesome photography business as well) informed us that they are $400 shoes! These suckers have basically no wear and are amazing. Alyssa scooped them up for just $29.99**! If you're in Elk Grove, head over...they buy, sell and exchange and are totally worth a trip! 

**I originally had these both down as $39.99 but remembered last night that they were an even BETTER deal than that! 

I'm a Big Ol' Meanie...

So the other night my good friend Jenni came over for dinner, along with a bunch of other good friends and my just ok brother.  (See how I put veiled insults in my blog to see if my family reads it?) Anywho, Jenni said that some of her law school friends read my blog, and some of those friends were afraid to write me to ask for fashion advice. I totally understand this, as I am quite the imposing and scary individual. As evidenced from this blog, you can tell that I am serious, no nonsense, and wicked mean. You would not want to send me an email asking for cheap fashion ideas, because I might yell at you. Or worse. So don't send me emails asking for advice, or where to find cheap stuff, because I'm not into that. See that outfit I made up there? Just killing time. Putting red and yellow together, with awesome flower punches, is SO not my style.
So get it straight: no emails. Don't send them to tracyonthecheap at gmail dot com. Just don't.

The scoop: Pulsar Watch, Overstock       Tank, Modcloth     Skirt, Modcloth      Necklace, Modcloth    Heels, Modcloth     Bag, Target

Shoe Envy

Are you seeing these shoes? Arghg! Shoe love! It would have been too easy to pair these with a LBD, so I tried to make them work-friendly. Would you wear them?
So I keep seeing that clip from the new Sex and  the City movie where Carrie is blown away by the concept of $20 shoes. Umm...I think Carrie and I might not be shopping buddies. I passed up a pair of $13 shoes yesterday because I was feeling cheap (these red flats).  Not that I wouldn't love a pair of really expensive shoes. I would. As long as someone else was paying.
Tell me blogland...what's the most you've ever spent on shoes? Was it worth it?

The scoop...all from that great place called Forever 21:
Heels
Jacket
Wooden Belt
Cami
Wire Cuff
Dome Ring
Ruffle Purse

Wedding Wear on the Cheap

As promised, here's how you outfit yourself and your spouse for a glamorous wedding, on the cheap:

Husband
Suit, Target: $50 on clearance
Shirt, Goodwill: $2.50
Tie, Target clearance: $12
Vintage Florsheim Shoes, Cancer store: $10
Total: $74.50

Me
Max and Chloe Dress, Ross: $40
Earrings, Walmart: $4
Jacket, Walmart, $4
Gold Wedges, Payless, $20
Total: $68


I'd like to think that it looks like we spent way more than that on our outfits than we really did. AND...I bought the dress with a gift card, so it hardly even counts. Score! My husband (isn't he a cutie?) is way proud of his $10 shoes. It's hard to find size 13's that aren't super ugly, so when they're quality and cheap, it's really a banner day.
Can I just add that my cut and color ran me only $35? Yeah, my hair lady is the bomb (even if I'm subjected to 45 minutes of conspiracy theories and town gossip, it's still worth it).

Well hello!

It's been quite a while since I fired up PhotoShop and put together an outfit. Doesn't it suck when real life gets in the way of your hobbies? Argh. Please forgive my mixed fonts in the image. This is the inaugural (holy cow that's a hard word to spell!) post on my new iMac. I've moved off my little laptop PC and onto a formidable 24" screen. I LOVE it. Why the move? Thanks to this little ol' blog here I've learned that I love design, working with colors, and creating things on my computer. Thus I've made the decision to launch a new career path very soon. Exciting stuff! My summer is devoted to learning everything I possibly can about the Adobe Creative Suite. Luckily I have a teacher husband home from school to provide child care and an office where I can sequester myself and study, study, study. When I emerge in August I hope to have a working knowledge of all things design. Bring it on, Dreamweaver, Illustrator, and InDesign. I love you PhotoShop, but I'm sure there's lots more to learn about you, too. Any advice as I widen my horizons and embark into this exciting new chapter?


The scoop: 
Nautical Earrings, Max & Chloe
Tank, Old Navy
Cardigan, Old Navy
Trouser Bermudas, Old Navy
Scarf, Old Navy
Sunglasses, Old Navy
Slingback Flats, Payless
Whale Tote, Etsy Via lalunedesigns

The Parental's

Those are my parent's. Aren't they cute? I have their permission to blog about them today (remember that Mom and Dad? Not sure if that was before or after the open bar). They were quite proud of their on the cheap wedding attire, so here's the scoop:
My dad got that tie either a. (mom's version) from an office supply store that was going out of business for 10 cents or b. (dad's version) he stole it from a box of them that a union was using to hang their signs. Either way, it's a pretty awesome tie, and he has a collection of them in other colors to boot. The mint green one is especially nice.
My mom's dress is vintage, and she bought it when I was seven, when it was over 30 years old. Doing the math makes it from the late 40's/early 50's. And knowing my mom she didn't pay more than $10. Her necklace was her mother's day present from yours truly, so I won't tell you how much it cost, suffice to say it was less than $10 and more than $5. Proud, Mom?
Some things I learned about my parents that night:
-Dad likes margaritas. A lot. He also likes to refresh his drink and chat up strangers when my mom decides it's time to go. He's a hoot.
-Mom hates nylons. She took them off and threw them in the trash. That's where I get my class. She also has a two beer limit. The volume of her voice is directly related to the number of beers she's consumed. That's what makes her fun.
Really though, my parents have been married for thirty years and are the most moral, upstanding, hard working people I know. They both have an amazing work ethic, and they truly enjoy each other. Without setting out to, they have taught my husband and I countless lessons on marriage and life. Love you guys.

Once upon a time I had this blog...

I made the image above for my friend Rebecca, who was married this past weekend in the most beautiful, loving, and fun-filled wedding I've ever been to. Becca, I hope it's ok I used your wedding images on my blog. And a side note: I totally jacked all those photos off Facebook and Flickr. So if you took them, please don't sue me. 


It's been a long month. Many times during the past 30 days I've considered ending the blog. No more. Kaput. But then, my dad (of all people) told me I shouldn't quit. Maybe, he said, just post once a week. (This was after I'd been introduced as "Tracy on the Cheap" to two different people at the aforementioned wedding...I guess there are people out there who read the blog after all!)
So, I'm back, and things are going to be different around here. I've got some new kettles on the stove to tend to, some exciting changes coming my way (and some other not so exciting ones), so there may be more snarky posting and less outfit putting together than in the past. Which reminds me, I'm sorry to all the people I promised outfits to. I'm fired. Seriously. I'm planning to get them out, slowly (although I understand that I totally dropped the ball on the events in May. Oops).
So there you have it. I'll post some more about the wedding later this week, including my parent's on the cheap wedding outfits and the dress I found at Ross that totally made my year.
And oh yes, I made a bet with my husband back at the beginning of April that I wouldn't buy any clothes until the end of August. I'll tell you all about that, too.

Hideously Beautiful Birthday Gifts, and other Musings

1. Last Saturday was my birthday, and after an amazing spa day, we went to my parents for dinner, where I opened this gift: 

At first glance, you may think what I thought..."That is the most hideous purse I have ever seen." But then it grew on me. Seriously grew on me. And now? I LOVE it. The huge tacky flowers. The seaweed like tentacles. The glitter. Turns out it's a Mary Frances purse (I'd never heard of her, but now I'm a big fan) and it still had it's $160 price tag. What'd my momma pay? Twenty bucks! I wore it to Trader Joe's and out to dinner yesterday and fully enjoyed all the "Oh my god look at that ugly purse!" looks it received. What do you think? Would you rock the tacky flower seaweed monstrosity?

2. I've got lots of requests to get to. This week I did my "real" job...doesn't it suck when real life gets in the way of your blogging life? So please be patient with me, I'm looking forward to some fun Photoshop action next week. 

3. I'm hoping you guys can help me make a decision (not a big, important decision, but a cheap fashion decision). I've got a wedding to go to in May, and I've made a bet with my cheap husband that I wouldn't buy any new clothes until the end of August. AUGUST! So I'm left with what I've got (or what I can borrow). I bought this Sue Wong dress over 10 years ago for $40 (with the $250 price tag still on it...what up!). I've worn it to almost every important event I've attended since then, but now it doesn't fit anymore (amazing what more lunges and less tater tots will do for a gal). I need to get it altered down, but I' wondering if it's worth it. Has anyone ever altered an expensive dress? It's got some complicated embroidery and pleating, do you think it's possible? Or, should I cash in some Ross gift cards and just get a new dress?

4. And finally, a shout out to my buddy Sharlene, who had a Tracy on the Cheap moment last week when she scored last minute tickets to a Black Eyed Pea's Concert. All she had was her conservative work suit, so she walked down to the mall and scored herself a top, leggings, belt and accessories for $70. Score! Go Sharlene! 

Roaring 20's...on the cheap!

Today I'm killing three birds with one outfit. Or something like that. 
1. Tiffani wrote recently and said, "So I saw the fabulous job you did for Jane of I Really Suck At This and her maternity-chic outfit, and I could really use some help. I am graduating (Bachelor's) in May and I really want to have a sophisticated, but sexy and  adult party-like outfit. My friends suggested doing a 'flapper' themed party, but I took a look on the internet...anything I found reminded me of cheap hookers or was really unflattering, which I figured out was the actual style of the 20's LOL. But I like the idea of having something vintage, and 1920/30/40's are good eras for 'chic' and 'sophisticated' ."
2. And then my friend Anna said, "I've got a Tracy on the Cheap assignment for you. My cousin is getting married in a couple of weeks and her wedding is "roaring 20s" theme. I'm at a total loss of what to wear. I don't want to spend money on something I'll never wear again so I'm hoping to do modern twist on the 20s. Help!"
3. And have I mentioned that I'm going to my friend Becca's Art Deco themed wedding in May, and have yet to find an outfit? (Check out the deco look I did for Becca's gorgeous mom Diana, here!)
Tiffani, I hope this look doesn't remind you of cheap hookers. And if it does, then stay tuned for next week, because I'm planning on working up a 40's/50's look for you, too! Anna, I think the accessories (and possibly the dress) can all be worn again, and for only $85, it's a steal!
And did I mention that everything comes from Forever 21? That store constantly amazes me with it's repertoire of chameleon-like fashion finds. 


The scoop: 
Fringed Flapper Dress
Flapper Dreamer Headband
Cut Out Rhinestone Bracelet
Jeweled Cobra Chain
Rhinestone Drop Dangle Earrings
Crackled Metallic Heels